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unit one
发布时间:2013-10-11 17:28:29 作者:刘柄辰  发布者:20136050 浏览次数:1856  类别:中文作文  
[大学一年级] 黑龙江省 >> 哈尔滨市 >> 黑龙江大学


 Hi, Dave I met two interesting people at the conference.
Barbara Grunewald is from Germany. She is a sales manager. Her office is in Hamburg. Business is good at moment. She is outgoing and get well with others. I believe her, and I think she will do well in the job. I believe we will have a happy partnership. And the other people I like is a Chinese women. Her name is Lili Wen. She is an accountant. Her office is in Heilongjiang Province. She is strict with work. What she like is just we really need. She is also a good women, and really be intrested in our company. I think if we have them help, we will do better on company. CBT Systems GmbH really need them.
What do you think ? Back to me soon, wish your email.
Yours, Viola.
教师点评:
  • 批改教师:陈伟 ( 山东省 >> 烟台市 >> 烟台工贸技师学院 )
    批改时间:2013/10/12 22:02:48
    点评指数:
    点评内容:

     Hi, Dave.

    I met two interesting people at the conference. : Barbara Grunewald and  Lili Wen. Barbara Grunewald,a sales manager, is from Germany., She is a sales manager. Her whose office is in Hamburg. Her Bbusiness is good at the moment. , partly because She is outgoing and could get on well with others. I believe her, and I think she will do well in the job. I believe we will have a happy partnership. And the other people I like is a Chinese women. Her name is , Lili Wen. , She who is an accountant. , with Hher office is in Heilongjiang Province. She is strict with in her work. What she like is just we really need. She is also a good women, and really be intrested in our company.

     I think if they could join and help us, we have them helpwe will do better on company

    CBT Systems GmbH really needs them.What How do you think ? 

    Back to me soon, wish your email.I'm really looking forward to hearing from you soon.
    Yours, Viola.

    点评:在语言的整体组织使用上,还需要稍加推敲。尽量使文章表述准确顺畅。

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